Thursday, June 25, 2009

ZOMBIE FRIDAY! Letters to SO & SO

ZOMBIE FRIDAY
Got to sleep in a bit today due to the 9:20 Dentist Appt. So I'm not to bad today! A bit hungry though since I was unable due to dentist orders allowed to eat anything since like 3am.

Without Further A-Do

Dear So and So...

Dear AutoFlush Toilet

If you could avoid flushing while I'm on you that'd be great, I'm not a huge fan of a wet ass, thank you.

Soaked-ly Yours
Bobby G
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Dear Douche bag in a Nissan Truck,

If you could refrain from going 20 under the speed limit I'd appreciate it, Making a traffic jam at 3:30 pm on a Tuesday cant be fun.

Road Raged-ly yours
Bobby G
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Dear Facebook,

I really would appreciate it if you would stop sending me random notifications for various games, apps, etc? It's obnoxious, I think I got a status comment or something important, and instead you want me to play Yo-Ville,

Spammed-ly yours
Bobby G
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Dear Customers,

Could you please refrain from asking me if I am losing my job when the paper closes? I am, so I really don't want to talk to you about it unless you offer me a legit job, thank you

Soon to be Unemployed-ly Yours
Bobby G

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Dear 4th of July,

Thanks for being on Saturday this year! I get the 3rd off, which isn't any holiday at all! Ill be getting drunk next Thursday, you rock!

Drunked-ly Yours
Bobby G
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Dear Jackson Customers,

Garage Sales aren't the answer to unemployment, that is all.

Bobby G
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Dear Magglio Ordonez (Tiger's Right Fielder)
can't believe you cut the hair off! Super sad, super sad.



Follicle-ly Sad,
Bobby G
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Have a great weekend folks!!!!! I'll be drugged up and hurting so have a better weekend than me!!!!

7 comments:

nikki said...

Don't remind me about Ordonez's hair. It makes me so depressed.

Lee said...

I think his hair looks hot.
Sorry.

I hate when the fucking toilets flush while I'm still on them.
You get the aftersplash on your ass, and it's just... ugh.

Hit 40 said...

Drugs!! Nice. Get some more while you have your medical coverage!! Hoard the drugs.

supertiff said...

a wet ass is MUCH better than having to deal with the automatic flush in the ft. lauderdale airport when you're super hung over and puking and every time you move your head the slightest bit the toilet starts flushing, even though you're totally not done puking yet, and it sprays all over your face. which just makes you need to puke even more than you did before.

not that this has ever happened to anyone i know.
and not that you were there, too.

Toni said...

When my ex lost his job along with 30,000 other people (he was with Woolworths) everyone kept saying how sad and shocking it was, ugh, no shitting sherlock! Got very annoying very quickly!

Kristen said...

Or when the stall is so small you have to practically stand on the toilet to close the friggin stall door!

And I like the hair. Maybe it was just the pics you put up...but I don't think so.

Bee and Rose said...

Folicly sad...hilarious!

Wet ass...bummer...

I love your Dear So and So...