Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Do You Work Here?

So I get to work at 6:50 am this morning because I'm setting up the obituaries today. I park in the lot because I'm here 3 fucking hrs, so I figured I might as well save me a walk from the parking structure on this cold, windy morning. So I walk in with a guy (I didn't recognize, probably from the editorial dept)and he uses his card to open the door, I grab the door and walk in behind him. "Do you work here?" he says. I'm kinda cranky when I'm at work before the sun rises, so I look at him and say "It 6:50 in the morning, do you think I'd be here if I didn't fucking work here?" he said "Good point" and let me in, I mean really? WOW some people are STUPID!

Tuesday, December 30, 2008

Drunken Bliss...Bartenders Bash 2002...a blast from BGs past!

If you could imagine a drunken utopia, it may be something like this. You wake up at 8am in a hotel on the fuckin ocean. From 10am-2pm you can drink ALL you want for free! Every liquor & beer company imaginable would be at the event, basically MAKING You drink all you can! Well this place is called bartenders bash! Basically its an annual event in April/May and its the servers time to get served. We get people drunk all the time, now its our turn. Well I attended this Merry festival in 2002. With Supertiff, Erika Van, and Dave. Here is how it went down...

Our flight was at something ridiculous like 5am on the day we had to leave. Oh and it left from Toledo. So Dave's Mom took Supertiff, Dave and I to Toledo at like 3am. Erika Van Met us later. We get Toledo Airport and we check our bags and I get searched. They search ALL My shit. Now this was my 1st time traveling after 9/11. It wasnt as bad as everyone said, or so I thought. So from Toledo, we get on a flight to Chicago. This flight was PURE HELL! It was only like 45 mins, but it was in a brutal thunderstorm. There was TONS of turbulence and at one point we even dropped like 15 feet, it scared the shit outta me, but Supertiff was in bad shape. She was terrified. We arrive in Chicago, to surprisingly nice weather, we get our bags, and continue on our merry way to get on the plane. I get hardcore searched again, I'm like WTF? But hey its security, its all good. From there we jump on a plane to Miami. We get to Miami and its GORGEOUS! And speaking of gorgeous, we meet Erika Van there as well. From Miami we jump on a plane to the keys. Now this is a fucking Buddy Holly death plane. it has room for like 15 people, it has 2 propellers, and the fucking pilot, basically rode with us. he didn't even have to make announcements on the intercom, he just said shit to us. Well we get to the keys and pickup our rental car. A 2002 Red Mustang Convertible! We roll down A1A to the keys (Isla Morada) and it was breath taking. But as we were rolling I could help think about True Lies, when they blew up the bridge. We all got sunburned as fuck on that car trip.

We get to our hotel and meet the other people that we knew there, Big Steph, her now husband Chris(?) and other great people. We drank ALOT and went to bed. The next morning the girls are up at 8, me & Dave sleep in a bit (til like 9) it is Bartenders bash Day 1! We get there at right about 10 when it opens. We are furnishing check stubs that prove we DO infact work at a restaurant, and therefore can be served! We get in and it CRAZY! first of all its right on the ocean. its a great location. 2nd its at a hotel, so people actually stayed there to get DRUNK AS FUCK! Third ALCOHOL EVERYWHERE! Literally EVERY liquor & beer manufacturer you can think of is there. Some give you shots, some give you mixed drinks, other give you beer, its all about WHAT YOU LIKE! Well 2:00 rolls around and we are SHITFACED. We somehow got home (meaning someone drove) also we must've got Burger King because it was all over the hotel room. Well I wake up at about 7:30pm in a haze, hungover as fuck! I'm offered a beer, but decline, after about 20 mins of being called a pussy etc., I decide to man up, it was rejuvenation! we roll to the bar which is open till 4am and party our asses off! The next morning w wakeup, bartender's bash, go to sleep wake up hungover and go again! This night however was hilarious! A friend of ours JS was there. JS and me always had a bit of flirtyness and due to our CRAZY state of drunkassness when we were at the bar, we decided we'd have sex. We go on the boardwalk and hook up. As we are dressing up I mention that I'm a bit lower on cash at this point of the game then I thought Id be. me & JS came up with a master plan. what we decided to do is tell people we were together. I would "let" horny guys make out with my "girlfriend" and in turn get free drinks! It WORKED from about 10 p.m. on If you could imagine a drunken utopia, it may be something like this. You wake up at 8am in a hotel on the fucking ocean. From 10am-2pm you can drink ALL you want for free! Every liquor & beer company imaginable would be at the event, basically MAKING You drink all you can! Well this place is called bartenders bash! Basically its an annual event in April/May and its the servers time to get served. We get people drunk all the time, now its our turn. Well I attended this Merry festival in 2002. With Supertiff, Erika Van, and Dave. Here is how it went down...

Our flight was at something ridiculous like 5am on the day we had to leave. Oh and it left from Toledo. So Dave's Mom took Supertiff, Dave and I to Toledo at like 3am. Erika Van Met us later. We get Toledo Airport and we check our bags and I get searched. They search ALL My shit. Now this was my 1st time traveling after 9/11.it wasn't as bad as everyone said, or so I thought. So from Toledo, we get on a flight to Chicago. This flight was PURE HELL! It was only like 45 mins, but it was in a brutal thunderstorm. There was TONS of turbulence and at one point we even dropped like 15 feet, it scared the shit outta me, but Supertiff was in bad shape. She was terrified. We arrive in Chicago, to surprisingly nice weather, we get our bags, and continue on our merry way to get on the plane. I get hardcore searched again, I'm like WTF? But hey its security, its all good. From there we jump on a plane to Miami. what do you know I GET SEARCHED AGAIN! I'm actually pissed at this point, but understand its random. We get to Miami and its GORGEOUS! And speaking of gorgeous, we meet Erika Van there as well. From Miami we jump on a plane to the keys. Now this is a fucking Buddy Holly death plane. it has room for like 15 people, it has 2 propellers, and the fucking pilot, basically rode with us. He didn't even have to make announcements on the intercom, he just said shit to us. Well we get to the keys and pickup our rental car. A 2002 Red Mustang Convertible! We roll down A1A to the keys (Isla Morada) and it was breath taking. But as we were rolling I could help think about True Lies, when they blew up the bridge. We all got sunburned as fuck on that car trip.

We get to our hotel and meet the other people that we knew there, Big Steph, her now husband Chris(?) and other great people. We drank ALOT and went to bed. The next morning the girls are up at 8, me & Dave sleep in a bit (til like 9) it is Bartenders bash Day 1! We get there at right about 10 when it opens. We are furnishing check stubs that prove we DO infact work at a restaurant, and therefore can be served! We get in and it CRAZY! first of all its right on the ocean. its a great location. 2nd its at a hotel, so people actually stayed there to get DRUNK AS FUCK! Third ALCOHOL EVERYWHERE! Literally EVERY liquor & beer manufacturer you can think of is there. Some give you shots, some give you mixed drinks, other give you beer, its all about WHAT YOU LIKE! Well 2:00 rolls around and we are SHITFACED. We somehow got home (meaning someone drove) also we must've got Burger King because it was all over the hotel room. Well I wake up at about 7:30pm in a haze, hung-over as fuck! I'm offered a beer, but decline, after about 20 mins of being called a pussy etc., I decide to man up, it was rejuvenation! We roll to the bar which is open till 4am and party our asses off! The next morning we wakeup, bartender's bash, go to sleep wake up hung-over and go again! This night however was hilarious! A friend of ours JS was there. JS and me always had a bit of flirtiness and due to our CRAZY state of drunkassness when we were at the bar, we decided we'd have sex. We go on the boardwalk and hook up. As we are dressing up I mention that I'm a bit lower on cash at this point of the game then I thought Id be. me & JS came up with a master plan. what we decided to do is tell people we were together. I would "let" horny guys make out with my "girlfriend" and in turn get free drinks! I NEVER paid for another drink. It was great! The next day we go out on the sand bar! I'm hung-over as shit from my 15 captain & Cokes I drank and am having a tough time, I had EXPLOSIVE diarrhea from dehydration mixed with hangover! I uttered the now famous phrase: "I wish I had a tampon for my ass!" But we were going on the sand bar anyways! The sand bar is a BUNCH of boats all tied together that resemble a city. There are TONS of boats and everyone is willing to give out a beer or a cocktail, nice people & GREAT times. After the sand bar we went the bars again. That night also Dave hooked up w/ this BAD ASS blonde chick. The problem was he disappeared from earth, no one knew where he was or who he was with (besides the hot chick). we eventually passed out w/ worry. OK it was from alcohol. The next morning we wake up and No Dave. His phone is dead. We have to leave the hotel at 11, well about 10:15 Dave rolls up. Mildly sunburned! He had to walk 5 miles. He left at 6am, but he successfully hooked up with said chick. The ULTIMATE walk of shame!

From Bartender's bash we roll to Key West. Hop in the mustang and TAKE OFF! We have this AMAZING 3 bdrm condo on the ocean! Literally 50 feet from the ocean! We had a bad ass deck, and a huge tub w/ jets, and since it was an actual house, we had a kitchen which allowed us to go buy groceries. So we did! Got lunch meat, frozen pizzas snacks and booze! We start with a few cocktails and eventually end up in the hot tub, with PIZZA! LMAO! One night we go out to downtown Key West, we hit Maragritaville for a Cheeseburger in Paradise and a Margarita. Then hit the bars! They have COOL ass bars there! Almost all of them have a outdoor chillspot! Well while there I meet this Gorgeous blonde girl. The only problem is she has this friend...Shes huge! Shes UGLY (huge teeth gap) and she a fucking bitch! Its the trifecta. Its a guaranteed cock block! Anticipating this I go find Dave! I'm like "DUDE! I need you to jump on the grenade" Hes like where is she, because he has EVER the open mind. when I point her out he's like "DUDE, if she was JUST fat or JUST ugly or JUST a bitch I could do it, but thats not a grenade, thats a fucking atom bomb!" Well eventually we party, and get them to come to our condo! I manage to get a little bit of play before the grenade bitched and they had to go.

We head out the next night again, and who do we see at the bar but hot chick and the grenade. We party it up and hot chick is drinkin her ass off, she was drinkin CUPS of Jaeger straight! no ice, no mix, just straight. Well by the end of the night she is the DRUNKEST person I have EVER seen. She cant walk talk or move! The time comes to leave and Dave gets her in a cab, now Key west is a SMALL island no move than 5 miles a cross, the cab ride took 35 mins, hot chick kept puking, and having to pee etc! While Dave is handling the hot chick, I'm stuck with the grenade, she seems to believe she has a limo coming to pick her up! She is also drunk as fuck and I decided Id add annoying to fat, ugly & bitchy! Finally I'm like "Look! you can stay here and wait for your limo thats never gonna come, or you cant take a fucking cab" she finally decides to get in and we drop her off at the hotel. I get back to my condo, and hot drunk chick is passed out in my room. She puked A LOT a WHOLE LOT but fortunately it was in the bathroom, so no crazy mess! well since this chick was in my room (2 beds) I had to look out for her, I was afraid she was gonna fucking die. Kept her turned so if she did puke she wouldn't of ended up in a Jimi Hendrix choke on your own vomit type scene. The next morning she gets up. She was like "Did we hook up?" I told her "No, I may be a lot of things but one thing I'm not is a rapist" she thanked me but said that "Its too bad we didn't hookup" I was like WOW!. The last night was chill. we hit the bars and since our plane left at 5am, and the bars closed at 4am, we went RIGHT from the bar to the airport. This was QUITE a scene. There were tons of us and EVERYONE was drunk! Just shitfaced! Apparently we all had the same idea! The flight back was fine, and we arrived at the Toledo airport & my dad KG picked us up. Supertiff's luggage never came, so that sucked, but other than that it was a Great time, with great people who Ill never forget it!

Monday, December 29, 2008

Bye Bye 2008, Get the Fuck Out and Good Riddance...

2008 Sucked..I mean REALLY REALLY Sucked. 2007 was great, it was supposed to be a great year, but everything came tumbling down. In 2007, I got married, got a house, Here are some of the awful memories ill never forget...Stupid 2008.

Got Divorced. Me and Bridgette just didn't work out married. We both had issues that ended up being too much to handle. We never should've gotten married, it just seemed like the next step. We were together 4 yrs, lived together, and we were in love, but in the end, we are just better as friends. The friendship isn't really blossoming right now, but over time I think it can work.

The divorce led to us having to sell our house. Which we are gonna lose our ass on! We are doing a short sale which is gonna mildly fuck up our credit for a few years. The bitch of it is that I spent all of my savings on bonds on the down payment, I could've used that money to pay off debt. Another thing that's a problem too is that I NEVER REALLY WANTED THE HOUSE. I knew I couldn't afford it but I knew it'd be a good investment, so I went for it. It wasn't a good investment at all. It may of been if we kept it for longer than 2 years. The market is garbage, Ypsi house are losing 2% OF THEIR VALUE EVERY MONTH, so its rough now. Hopefully we can get this house sold, and move the fuck on.

I lost two dear friends this year. Mike Flemming and Tom Snell. Mike got killed by a drunk driver in Aug in Milwaukee WI. he was a dear family friend. Tom died on a ride in Dallas from a massive heart attack at a friends house. Both of these men were great family men, and both were amazing people. Both deaths were so tragic. We will never forget you guys! RIP gentlemen.

UM football went 3-9, the worst season ever. We didn't go to a bowl game for the 1st time in 33 years. We lost to MSU, OSU and Notre Dame, It was terrible! Now I don't blame coach Rod yet, he was ill suited to run his offense. The team will be good in a few years, UM will be back to national prominence soon!

The Lions went 0-16. The Worst team in the history of the NFL. They never gave up but they just weren't good enough. I blame the ownership, the Fords are AWFUL. With them owning the team, we will never win anything, they just don't give a fuck.

Now it wasn't all bad, I met a great girl at the end of 2008. She's a big sweetheart and 2009 looks bright with her. 2009 EXCITES ME. It cant really be worse than 2008. I'm looking forward to leaving this piece of shit year behind. Oh one more little 2008 bonus, I have to work my 2nd job on New Years ever till 2, I don't even get to send 2008 off with a bang. Fuck you 2008, good riddance!

Sunday, December 28, 2008

The Worst...EVER.....

I was hoping that Id never have to write this post. But alas my beloved Detroit Lions are now officially the worst team EVER in NFL history, 0-16. The previous team of awful was the 1976 Tampa bay Buccaneers. Who is the worst off alltime you ask? ESPN did a debate here The lions are so bad! Bad coaching, bad execution, bad mgmt, bad players. To be fair he players NEVER quit, they just weren't good enough to win. 7 years of Matt Millen mistakes, catapulted the lions into this position. Well t be fair, Bill Ford Sr, is too old to run this franchise effectively. The Fords don't' give a fuck about the franchise, and they will never put in the necessary money to make it work. The lions have some good things going for them though, a great new stadium, PASSIONATE fans, and some good players to build around such as Calvin Johnson, Ernie Sims and Kevin Smith, but until they get their QB PROTECTION, IT WILL NEVER WORK. Take the best avail Left Tackle number one, and with the 2nd 1st rd pick, get a good QB. Its the Lions only hope. They have to forget about the past mistakes, and concentrate on the future. The lions have never been to a Superbowl, they have won 1 playoff win in almost 60 yrs. Their last NFL championship was in 1957. This post pains me to writ, I'm sick to my stomach because as bad as this team is, its really hard to believe they are the worst ever. As I watched tape of past games, they made BAD mistakes, there were awful coaching decisions, and game killing penalties. They will forever be known as the worst, no one can be worse, only as bad. Below is a video from Barry sanders, the most exciting player of all time! That should ease some sadness. If you have never really watched Barry run, do yourself a favor, watch the video...you wont be sad.

So Mr Ford, you need to do whatever you can to make the Lions win, if hat mean stepping down as Owner, DO SO, we the fans of suffered so long! We really just want a team that can compete with the NFL elite, We deserve that i think...

Tuesday, December 23, 2008

Relax! Its the Vertical Pedal on the Right!

45 Fuckin minutes. Thats Right 45 fuckin minutes! Thats how long it took me to go 4 MILES on the way home from work today. I get it its snowy..thats cool. But why does traffic freak the fuck out? Why is there traffic backed up as far as the eye can see? there is no difference except the snow, there wasnt an accident but yet it takes me 45 mins to go 4 miles? Im not asking you folks to do anything you dont want to do...but in case you are wondering its the vertical pedal on the right...

Monday, December 22, 2008

Happy...Finally...

Well its been a rough 3 or so months for Bobby G. 1st In Sept me & my wife decided to get a divorce, it was final on 12/11. It was really surreal to realize what you worked so hard for for 5 years just didnt work out. At first I blamed her, then i blamed myself, but in the end we were both to blame. I had to move out of my house to avoid a "the Breakup" like situation w/ my ex wife. Moved to my parents house, which is an adventure for sure. After being out of there for about a decade, its CRAZY to be back there. It has its perks though, warm dinners everyday, ever so often mom will just DO my laundry. the Drawbacks however are many as well. I have to plow the snow, rake leaves, clean eaves, and all kinds of other things. the WORST part though is not having my OWN place. Its kinda tough to bring girls back to your parents house, especially now that I found one. This girl is INCREDIBLE! She beautiful, sweet, sexy, fun and a GREAT person. Shes there for me when I have my "bad" days, and shes very compassionate and caring. Shes 31, so this is the first time ive ever dated an older girl. the benefits are GREAT! Shes mature, she has a good job and a great place, shes an adult. In the past I havent dated older girls because i was mature enough to do so. PERIOD. Ive done A LOT of growing in the last year. Ive matured a lot and went through some adult experiences that I never thought I would go through. for the 1st time really in 2008 im finally happy. 2008 was BY FAR the worst year of my life, Ive experienced heartbreak this year that I cannot explain. From losing two great friends, to the breakdown and eventual collapse of my marriage. This girl however, gives me optimism, not only for the rest of 2008, but in the future as well. its gonna be a great ride, Im just glad that i have a passenger again....

Tuesday, December 16, 2008

That Summer....

In these shitty winter months, I often reminise of good summer times Ive had. Well everyone growing up has that summer! The one maginificent summer that kind of defines your childhood. The one where your memories never seem to fade. For me it was the Summer of 1994...The Christina Summer. My next door Neighbor Jenny, had a friend come stay for the summer. Her name was Christina. She was a GORGEOUS blonde, and of course we were ALL about her. One of the best things about that summer is the music. Ice cube Lethal Injection, Snoop Dogg-Doggy Style, Dre Dre The Chronic, Beastie Boys-Ill Communication, Eazy E Its On 187 Dre Killa, those albums DEFINED my childhood, I cant hear, BopGun, whats MY Name, Nuthin but a G thang, Sabotage, or Real Muthaphukkin G's without thinkin of that summer. We would go get refils of our Mountain Dew freeze refills for like 79 cents, stock up and devour some airheads, play basbeall, ride our bikes, and just have a good ass time! Ineveitbly the summer ended, Christina went home and the summer was over, but those memories will NEVER die!

Thursday, December 11, 2008

Bobby G's EXCELLENT Divorce Adventure...

OK, this was supposed to be easy right? I got to court, have them check my paper work, ready my testimony & I'm out the door right? WRONG! First off, no one knew where the fuck I needed to be, I heard this court, I heard that court, I heard this judge & I heard that judge. I get to the court at 12:45, I get where I need to be at 1:45. I got to the court, the lady looks over my paperwork and says "wheres Bridgette?" I'm like "Shes at work" the court lady says "She needs to be here" I'm like "OK, well what can I do" She said "She has to sign this paper" I'm like "OK what if I hightail it over to her work and have her sign this, and hightail it back?" She said "If we are still here doing divorces that ll be fine" So I bust out of the court, roll to the structure, get in the the VW, BUST ASS out to Bridgette works way the hell out on Oak Valley Dr, have her sign the shit, BUST ASS back to the court and get to the courtroom and the doors are locked, and the lights are off, I'm like "FUCK!!!!" A lady hears me and says "Can I help you?" I'm like "yeah I had my wife sign these things and it looks like you are done." She said "Oh the are right across the hall" Sure enough they are. I get the papers to the lady and thing gets in motion. I go around the corner, and sit next to a guy we shall call him "MIKE" Mikes divorce has been DRAMA! its been going on since 2006 and the crazy bitch is trying to stick him for shit, that he doesn't even have. She wants insurance for life and stuff, and this is the 5th time hes been to court for this divorce. He was a cool ass guy. He was funny, hes had a rough life, grew up in the projects in Cleveland, was an alcoholic, been married twice, good stories, it really helped the time pass! Well finally we get in the courtroom and finally I say my testimony, that's right 3 FUCKING HOURS for two minutes in court. I was relieved to be done, but I was PISSED OFF! The good news is work gave me a 3 hr lunch break, and I don't have to make up the time. And thus concludes Bobby G's EXCELLENT DIVORCE ADVENTURE!!!!

Wednesday, December 10, 2008

Bobby G Spot Deep Dictionary-Specticalacular

Specticalacular

Spec-Tickle-Ac-ular (Adj)

To look fantastic (spectacular) in glasses.

Man Liz Hurley is fly but w/ her glasses on shes Specticalacular

Locked Locks, Frozen Dreams...

Well I got out to my car this morning and its FREEZING! Go to stick my key in my locks and its FROZEN SOLID. I'm like shit! So I go to the other side and it to is FROZEN SOLID! I'm like FUCK! So I got back to the driver's side and I get my key in, wiggle it back and forth for a while and FINALLY the car doors unlock. I pull the door handle NOTHING! I'm like GREAT! So I go to the passenger door! get in the car, crawl over the seat, and get in the driver's seat, attempt to open the door from the inside NOTHING! SO I call my parents and tell them my door handle is broken. I get to the shop, and the fucking door opens RIGHT UP! It must've been frozen, which is better than having to buy a new door handle...OH WINTER!

Monday, December 8, 2008

Ever Wish You Can Just Hit Those Fuckers?

Now its true...this is my 3rd blog post of the day but there have been an alarming amount of people just jumping in front of my car! SERIOUSLY! Its like the fucking Happening out there! I'm ready just to say screw it! I'm just gonna fucking hit them! But that VW emblem engraved in their fucking ass! I get out of work at 5:00 ITS DARK! ITS RAINING! There are people rocking all black, just walking in front of my car. I can barely see them! They don't even look in my direction! Those smug, rich daddy having bitches! They are walking across 4 lanes of traffic w/ no sense of urgency at all, during rush hr? SERIOUSLY! Its about to be game over! LOL OK OK rant over.....

Bobby G Deep Dictionary Leftermost/Rightermost

Leftermost/Rightermost

Left-er-Most, Rite-er-most (Adj)

Definition- Farthest left or farthest right

Example

See those 2 left turn lanes? You are going to get into the Leftermost lane, that way you wont have to merge back over.-

Divorce Week! What I learned about myself!

This is the final week of my marriage. The Divorce is final Dec 11, so I decided to do a blog about what I learned about myself from the divorce. Neither me or my wife had a long term relationship before this. That hurt us. We didn't acknowledge our problems we just swept them under the rug and eventually they all came out. We didn't know how "to be in a relationship" 5 years is a long time, but it was still a training period for us. Once we got that paper that said we were married it was all over. It changed EVERYTHING! We lived together for 2 yrs, so I know it wasn't that we couldn't live together, I think what it is was that we just weren't ready to be married in the 1st place. I wouldn't say we rushed into it, but we for sure needed more time for us. Until we got divorced we never had ANY fight of sizable importance. That's NOT NORMAL! It should've been a red flag for me, but I didn't think anything of it, i thought she was just that great. Turned out what happened was that she held everything inside, and in order to avoid confrontation, she just never told me anything, well eventually that volcano erupted, and the shit hit the fan. Now on the surface, this may look like her "fault" but the reality is we were both at fault. I was not a good husband. I wasn't in tune w/ her needs, and I treated her like a little sister sometimes instead of my wife. There was a lot of love there, but I wanted out as much as she did. She is 5 yrs younger than me, I also think that was a factor, there is a big difference between 25 & 30. For me it was a complete 180 in that age range. Another thing that drastically affected our marriage was the house. See when we got the house I knew I couldn't afford it, so instead of not saying anything, I kept it in, then I started living on credit cards, well my debt ballooned to around $20,000 and I never told her how out of hand it had gotten. Now we are trying to sell it and we are going to lose our asses on it! Lesson learned. In closing I'd like to state that me & my ex wife are fine. we are cordial, and we are giving each other space. We really only talk about house & divorce related stuff. But we need that.

Sunday, December 7, 2008

Love lost...NOT SO FAST!

MY divorce is final this Thursday. Its fuckin surreal! Though in my own eyes I have been divorced for 3 or so months, the finality of it is so serious! I am in GREAT Spirits, ready for this part of my life to be done so I can start over. The process of starting over seemed daunting. Meeting a new person that you are compatible with is HARD! Believe it or not, not everyone can handle Bobby G! lol. Being single BLOWS! I Miss having someone. Well I found someone. She is smart funny, pretty, and all in all amazing! I know you are prob thinkin, "Bobby G its to soon!" You know what, there is no such thing as too soon! Its be STUPID of me to fight this potentially GREAT thing because its "Too Soon". There is going to be a growing period for sure! But so far so good! She brightens my days & my spirits. I still have tough days (Thanksgiving comes to mind) but she is there to help me through! The "honeymoon" period here is AWESOME! So heres to starting a new chapter as one closes.Me & my ex wife are still friends, initially I thought the 5 years we had together were a waste, I know now that that isnt true! It was never bad until the end, I loved my exwife, but thy say when you love something let it go, I am doing that, and I couldnt be happier!

Saturday, December 6, 2008

Lexus for Xmas?

For SEVERAL years now Lexus has ran ads for the December to remember. Now the basis of said commercials is that husband/wives actually give their spouses a Lexus for Xmas. WTF? I bet that happened once EVER! Lexus found out and was like yeah...thatd be a great commercial. But it wont be complete unless we put a Giant Ridonk bow on it! I do enjoy this year batch of commercials though! Here is my favorite!

Thursday, December 4, 2008

The Bobby G Spot Deep Dictionary- Ridonk!

Ridonk
Re-Donk(Adj)

Ridiculous

Example
Dude did you see Magglios Home run last night, that was RIDONK!

Other versions- Ridonkulous

The Secret Is Out!

Last night at work we had a bunch of ladies from the Victoria Secret store in Briarwood come to the restaurant. They watched the Victoria Secret Fashion show at my work, That's right! Marissa Miller, Heidi Klum and all my favorites were on HDTV at my work! I initially thought the girls were bitches! They kept running me around! And at first some of them seemed condescending.But after a few drinks THEY WERE A BLAST! Most of them were GORGEOUS, because that's how VC girls roll! They were super flirty and fun & they TIPPED ME FAT! I made a Wednesday record $110 last night! I was there however until midnight, so it was a long day! But I made some money and had some fun and that is what matters!

Wednesday, December 3, 2008

The Bobby G Deep Dictionary-Raunch-Deez.

This is a new segment on the G-Spot, ill give u definitions of random made up words I use all the time. This word is Raunch-Deez.

Raunch-Deez
Raunch Deez (Adj)
Something really nasty.
Example:
Man that fart was Raunch-Deez dude, I think my dog just died.

(Saturn) Skys The Limit


The Saturn Sky...the main focus on Saturn's remodeled new line. At first glance it appears to be a fairly bad ASS roadster. But upon further review ITS STILL A SATURN! Dress it up anyway you want it is still a Saturn. Saturn's are the girliest car manufacturer, (The Mazda Miata & the Pontiac Sunfire are however the girliest cars) w/ their no haggle pricing, and woman friendly sales pitch. Its a good thing to have a car company that is pressure free and doesn't try to take advantage of women buyers, but why are you making a roadster? I DONT GET IT! It has 173 HP its a 4cyl, read Its not that fast. (I should preface this by saying there is Saturn Sky Redline that offers a 260 HP 4 cyl standard) But in general it looks a lot faster than it is. So who buys Saturn Skys? Well apparently Tim Gunn from Project runway has one, is Saturn trying to corner the gay fashion designer market? Thatd be a smart move! Also you see many of the same people driving these who drive Mazda Miatas, mid life crisis guys who think they are getting a bad ass sports car...In closing Id like to say the Saturn Sky is a cool looking car, but looks can be deceiving...

Tuesday, December 2, 2008

KARAOKE THURS DEC 4 Wings Pizza N Things...

Hey yall! I will be hosting Karaoke on Thurs December 4 at Wings Pizza N Things (my 2nd Job) State & Mich Ave Saline, and there are great drink specials! $3 32 oz budlight,$2 pints of Bud Light $2.50 wells, $4 Jaeger Bombs. It runs from 9-1am, and there is no cover! Come on out, sing some jams & enjoy yourself!