Tuesday, September 30, 2008

Laziness/Fat People

Now we are all lazy from time to time. I may be more lazy than others but I will NOT stoop to this low:
So I'm leaving work the other day (a2 News) and I am behind a larger lady, she holds the door I say thank you then SHE runs past me and opens the handicapped door and just waits, I say to her "really" and just walk away. WTF? lol. Seriously? I'm like waiting for a handicapped door, that's nuts! Also i hate the people who pile onto the parking elevator after work and say "Floor 2 please" I'm like really you cant walk 1 fucking floor? OK. Don't get me wrong if I'm on 3 I use the elevator lol but if I'm on 2I HAVE to take the stairs or I feel lame. Also whats up w/ the marginally fat people w/ the scooters. Most of these people are not carnival freak fat but id say they are 50 or so lbs over weight, I'm like really? walking may do you (not your knees) some good!
Also on the subject of fat people have you seen the PRO high fructose Corn Syrup Commercials? They are CRAZY! here they are below in 1 video:

SERIOUSLY! PRO HIGH FRUCTOSE CORN SYRUP COMMERCIALS! they might as well have PRO type 2 Diabetes Commercials & Pro childhood Obesity Commercials. It was funny when me & my wife were watching TV and saw that commercial we were like WHAT!? because at first it looks like an anti HFCS commercial, then we were floored! I'm not the healthiest person on earth, but I have learned A LOT about what to look for and what not to have in your food, HFCS is at the TOP of the list, its the New Trans Fat, So heres to you HFCS making our children a little fatter 1 popsicle at a time!

Sunday, September 28, 2008

WTF am I getting into......?

So as a recently divorcing individual I HAD to get out of the house. So my parents were gone this week so I lived at their house for the last week, Its been cool, lo-key, I went out a lot had some fun, it was a welcome vacation. Well I'm not able to go back yet, due to the tension that we still have, but the bad news is the parents came back today....its gonna be an adjustment. My parents are cool as shit, about as cool as parents can be honestly, they party, they are bikers, and they are in general good times...when I don't have to live with them. Now its constant questions about this and that....its crazy dad talks mom interrupts dad answers, then he goes back on to his story. Its crazy I feel like a nuisance, they got to arrange their lives which is very nice of them. I'm not sure how permanent this is, I mean obviously it will be, but I may have to go home ever so often, to use my bad ass TV, Watch my DVRd shows, etc, but for the near future I'm here. So here's to Bobby G living with his parents its gonna be interesting.....

Friday, September 26, 2008

B & B Dirty Dirty 30 30 Reminder1!

On November 8, 2008, there will be a MASSIVE Party at Frenchies in Depot town! Bobby Garrott(your truly) And my Buddy Ben Roeser both turn 30 the same week (Me the 1st of Nov, he the 6 of Nov)So we are having a GIANT dual blowout bash! Anyone who reads this is invited! Also tell friends of yours I hope to see some of the Blog Crew there! There will be more reminders!

Wednesday, September 24, 2008

The Old Guy in the Club...

Being w/ the same girl for the last 5 years has really taken its toll on my game. I used to be a ladies man. I still can flirt like a pro but I'm not sure if I can close anymore. My biggest worry is going to the club, See what Chris rock has to say about it below!

Ill be 30, not that old but a little old for the club. Everyone there is going to be 21 or younger (fake IDs) bars aren't really a logical place to meet people anymore. they are a place to meet people to HOOK Up with, but not for legit relationships. Its funny because online is becoming a legit place to meet people. I got my match.com profile filled out, so far no bites lol Its kind of surreal, the fact that I can meet someone online, it used to be for freaks & dorks, but like I said it has become legit. I have NO expectations for this, in fact I'm kinda excited, kinda nervous, but mainly i have NO expectations, I'm gonna hit parties & bars and have fun be single again, 30 is the new 20? whats 20? the new 6 and a half?

Friday, September 19, 2008

Trueblood! & Sons of Anarchy!

There are 2 new shows im REALLY diggin this year. The 1st is Trueblood on HBO, the premise is that Vampires are now "out of the coffin" it is acknowledged that they are amongst us and most people seem cool with it (except the religious freaks!) Now the reason they are "out" is that there is a synthetic blood called true blood so most vampires dont need to eat humans anymore, of course some still do. Anna Paquin plays Sookie Stackhouse( LOVE THE NAME) and she is a human but she can read peoples minds, a gift that she HATES! She can hear 50 people at once and it drives her nuts, her friend Tara is Hilarious! Shes black and opinionated and just great, she plays comic relief on the show. The vampire that Sookie (Anna Paquin) is in love with is Bill (Worst vampire name ever?) He was a Civil war vet and he is trying to come to grips with being a vampire and he also seems to be falling for Sookie, its only 2 episodes in, so its not too late to watch it!

Sons of Anarchy on FX is a bad ass show! Its pretty much Sopranos w/ a biker gang instead of the mob. The premise is a gang call Sons of Anarchy Motorcycle Club Redwood Original (SAMCRO) is running this little town called Charming California. They have the cops on the payroll, but a new officer Hale is trying to clean up the town. He and SAMCRO have mad issues, Katy Segal is back (Peg Bundy on Married w/ Children)and she looks GREAT! Shes a cougar for sure! The leader of the gang is Clay (Ron Perlman of Hellboy fame) and he is married to Gemma (Katy Segal) Gemmas stepson Jax is the VP of the group and one of the younger members, his dad started the club in the 60s. Overall there is a lot of kick ass bikes, and violence and for some reason they can say shit on FX which is cool, and they take full advantage of it lol, they are 3 shows in check it out, its SWEET!

Wednesday, September 17, 2008

Urinal Etiquette, the Definitive Guide.

So I am at work today at the urinal, and my boss comes up next to me. He starts a conversation, now this is an awkward moment in urinal etiquette because hes my boss. If it was someone else id say "hey" and itd be done. Now when you are at a urinal and someone comes next to you, you must focus forward, if it helps to focus on graffiti or even a speck of dirt then you can do that. There should be NO TALKING, even if I know you, talking is typically prohibited unless you are not in the urinal next to me or at the sink washing your hands out of view. However typically I just wait until I'm all done.

Sporting Events
Now Sporting Events pose a different challenge all together, thanks to a lovely creation I call "The Group trough" See below:

Now when you are at the group trough its pretty much like a long feeding trough for cows (Hence the name) and a slight slope w/ a drain at the end. The group trough may be the quietest place on earth. Its you & your cock on display for all to see without any barriers in between. You MUST focus forward, people don't want their dicks looked at & you also don't want to see one anyways.

UM Stadium
UM football Stadium is a whole other beast in itself. While the rules are basically the same as the group Trough it is its own beast. The Men's room at UM Stadium is basically a series of walls about 5 feet high with water running down it & a drain situation at the bottom. A men's roof at UM Stadium can easily hold 400 people, its extremely efficient, but not a very comfy situation, like the stadium itself you are RIGHT next to the guy your pissing with, its kind of a tense moment.

So ladies now you know, I feel urinal etiquette is passed on from a father to a son, Dad teaches you all the necessary rules you need to survive, and you take it from there. Its a strong foundation of manhood! Maybe the most important thing you learn EVER in life.

Monday, September 15, 2008

Ok here it goes....

Im getting divorced, the love isnt there any longer on both sides, and we decided to end it. Im good, I had a solid week to deal and it made it easier because I was on vacation from work. So im dealing with issues regarding selling the house (anyone need a nice house cheap?) after that we'll file for divorce, shes going to get an apt. im moving in w/ the rents, and paying off some debt. We still live together and its good, it went from being married to being roommates over night which is weird, but we are dealing. There is no resentment or animosity, only awkwardness at times. if ya wanna talk to me about it feel free bgismo20@gmail.com, ill talk to anyone or answer any questions, it helps me to talk about it. I love all you guys, and thanks for your time.


Saturday, September 13, 2008

Sorry about the delay folks....

Going through a lot of personal shit right now, ill tell yall about it once it has blown over. Love you guys.

Wednesday, September 3, 2008

Awful Movie From My Childhood Alert


Teen wolf was on a cable TV station called FUSE last night here in Ypsi. I used to love that flick when I was a kid! It was AWFUL! I mean it was funny because it was awful, but it is nowhere near the movie I remember. For those who dont know, its Michael J Fox right after back to the future, hes a unpopular kid at his school, his friend Boof is all about him but hes all about this hot chick named Pamela. He starts to go through some changes, eventually he turns into a wolf! As teen wolf hes THE MAN! He suddenly AWESOME at basket ball! but he becomes so cocky that his team mates dont like him. he becomes super popular and even draws interest from Pamela. At the end him and Boof get together and he disses mega hottie pamela. At the end of the movie there is the championship basketball game. His team who SUCKS BAD want MJF to be the Wolf but he keeps the wolf at bay and win the championship. Now the basketball montage in the end of this movie is BY FAR the worst ive ever seen! dont believe me? here it is:
I told ya......

Tuesday, September 2, 2008

Oh Deer

Im driving to work at about 6am this morning because I had to do obits at work today. Im going along at about 5 over on Geddes ave right by the water, a tight twisty road that is by the Huron River (great on the bike). Im in a daze because its 6AM! and as I come around a corner there is a Deer. I SLAM on my brakes and barely miss him by like 4 or 5 feet. Its the closest ive ever come to hitting a deer, and id never like to come that close again. Im still a little shaky....