Friday, October 31, 2008


Having a halloween Bday (ok Nov 1) is kinda cool, there are tons of parties goin on & they all are so fun because everyone is dressed up & stuff. People love to get drunk on halloween or as I call it dress like a slut free day. Halloween is great for me because all girls dress sexy! Sexy Nurses, sexy lion tamers, sexy girl scouts, sexy vampires (a personal favorite!) & about a million other Sexy costumes! Now that im single I can actually FULLY enjoy said costumes lol. Happy Bday to me, im 30 tomm, and prob wont post for a few days due to hungoverness!

Tuesday, October 28, 2008


Amy Wiseman turned me onto her. SHE IS FANTASTIC! Shes a modern day Billie Holiday in ever aspect! Her voice has that 50s-60s throwback. Super powerful & very Jazzy/Soulful. This album is 38 mins of amazing! From the damn near a Capella Syrup & Honey to the throwback Mercy . Her voice POPS on the almost Stand By Me style Stepping stone. She wails it out on Im scared, and croons her way into your heart on Rockferry.

I am blown away! check it out, enjoy it! I'm sure you will.

Bang Alot, Get a Free House....

So im flippin through TV a little while back, and I happen to come to a little show called Extreme Makeover Home Edition. There was a lady on there w/ like 50 kids. Seriously she must bang like 20 times a day...a little too fertile for me! lol. But the EMHE douchebag host is gonna build her a house. Now Im thinkin, I like to bang, all I have to do to get a free house is bang? well shit, might as well! I can also get a free house if I have cancer or am mentally challenged, so I decided to go for bangion lol. Wish me luck on my bangin for a house adventure! lol. Ok so im not gonna have 300 kids to get a free house, but I feel like people on this earth need a free house more than people who bang all the time.

Monday, October 27, 2008

Best TV Theme Songs

These are my Favorite TV theme Songs/intros ever!
The Sopranos Come w/ me as I roll to my house in suburban New Jersey. We can pass awesome landmarks along the way. Fuhgetaboutit

Growing Pains
Ah the Seavers...Check out pics of them when they were little, to adulthood.

Reading Rainbow- Have you ever seen the Reading Rainbow intro on WEED MAN!?

Family Ties- Oh the 80's ness of it all!

Full House- Frisco & Mullets, who can ask for anything more.

Fresh Prince of Bel-Air (Long version) Rarely Seen, Long version w/ the airplane ride & stuff.

Did I miss your favorite? let me know!

Sunday, October 26, 2008

Its So Damn Literal.

Found this last night, its the literal take on the 80s video Take on Me by A-Ha. About the funniest thing I've ever seen.

Heres the Rick Roll.

Thursday, October 23, 2008


Usually when a celebrity lends his name to a product its just a re-packaging on an old product. Not the case with Tim Mcgraw though. He has lent his name to prob the most delicious cornchip in the history of the earth. McGraws Spicy Jalapeno Fritos. OH my god! they are a delight. I love spicy stuff anyways & I have always loved Fritos but these bad boys are just delicious! Nice work Tim McGraw! Way to represent!

Wednesday, October 22, 2008

Blogging for stress..

I know I have been blogging a lot lately. Probably an insane amount lol. Ive been stressing hard. Divorce, trying to sell a house, money issues, its like damn how much more can a brother take? BY far this is the hardest time in my life. I just want to get through all this bullshit! This is an outlet that helps me A LOT! A TON! I consider myself a good person. Why do bad things happen to good people? Part of it is my fault, I went apes shit with credit cards in my mid 20s. I now how a shit ton of debt that I am paying off as I can. The debt also contributed (partially) to my divorce, which in turn led to money problems, and all my stress. The moral of this story? credit Cards are evil. I wish that when Ed Norton blew up all those credit card companies in fight Club that all that actually happened. Seriously, no more debt for the US. That would be TIGHT! I also think the government instead of giving the banks $700 Billion should have gave that to the US people. Think about it, people would pay off mortgages, credit cards, car loans etc., also people would buy cars, houses, etc., the banks would take care of their selves. I'm so tired of all this bullshit...the bitch of it is, its my fault.

Tuesday, October 21, 2008

Pinckney Highschool Craziness.

In Case you guys haven't heard this story let me break it down for you. A 14 yr old Pinckney HS Student used her Camera phone to take pictures of her private parts nude this summer and texted them to some of her friends. Well they got send all around to over 200 students. Now this has caused an uproar at Pinckney HS. How is the school involved you ask? Superintendent Dan Danosky said "It happened outside of school, but we can investigate because it affects what goes on at school. Now we're waiting for a report from the sheriff's department before we decide whether to take action." The Sheriff you ask? YES! They want to prosecute this girl for child pornography. That's nuts! Now it was a damn stupid thing to do, no doubt, but child pornography? REALLY? This girl is going to be on the sex offenders list for the rest of her life for doing something stupid, she meant no malice here. Also the school has suspended 20 students who either sent this picture or received it. That's BS too, it shouldn't be the schools issue. There are going to be some PISSED OFF Parents. I can see if you sent it, but how is it my fault if I received it? They prob should have deleted it, but its not everyday you get a pic of a vagina sent to your phone lol. They were probably ecstatic! I would've been in HS! Shit I would be now! (as long as it was an of age vagina lol) So in closing girls don't take pictures of your vagina unless you want the earth to see it!

Monday, October 20, 2008

Reasons Why I know Im Getting Old.

So approaching the big 3-0 I decided to reflect on how I know I am getting old & why. Here we go!

10. 2 Day Hangovers- When I was 22 this shit NEVER happened. Now if I drink liquor for a night I'm hungover for 2 damn days, its BRUTAL! At 22 I could drink till 5am go to work at 9 and be good to go in a few hours, now I can be either hungover OR tired, not both, if I'm both my day is over before it begins.

9.Young Girls- Ive always liked young girls not dirty young but between 18-23, but now that I'm almost 30 that is dirty young. And 18 yr old was in kindergarten when I was a senior in HS, WOW

8. Young Girls Moms- I actually closer to a 40 yr old moms age than I am to her 18 yr old daughter, that's MIND BOGGLING!

7. Sleep- I used to be able to function on 3-4 hrs of sleep, now if I don't get 7 hrs I'm FUCKED!

6. Memory- I forget random shit, like did I take my medicine? or did I use shampoo in the shower this morning, WTF? lol

5. Losing touch- I have no idea what the "kids" are into now a days, That started w/ Pokemon, that was the 1st thing I didn't understand.

4. Earlier Nights, Earlier Bed- Remember when you didn't go to the bar until 11? Now I'm in bed by then during the week! lol

3. People I know are having Kids-Good friends are having babies, not ooops babies but legit we should have a baby babies. That's CRAZY!

2. Random Soreness- Now this also may because im out of shape (isn't round a shape?) But its funny if I do anything mildly tiring (Mowing the lawn for instance) Im sore for like 3 days.

But the number 1 reason I know I'm getting old.
1. Weekday bar nights- I used to go the bar during the week ALL THE TIME! Now if I do it (when I have to work the next day) I hate the earth for 48 hrs. I love the bar during the week! I miss it!

So that's my list! When did you know?

Sunday, October 19, 2008

A Whole New Migraine...

I get Migraines, they blow, but the last few times I've had them they have been different. Not worse but way more scary. They are a sharp pain in the right hand side of my head. They feel like im getting stabbed, the pain last just for a second but it comes back every 10 mins or so. They are called stabbing headaches & I thought I was having a stroke or something, but I looked on Web MD and realized what was up so now I have to deal with it. Today is gonna blow.....

Saturday, October 18, 2008

Things I Hate That People Seem to Love...

I seem to be in the minority quite often. I really hate these things below. PEOPLE LOVE THIS SHIT! Here we go!

The Doors/Pearl Jam: Ah the Doors, the band that said "Hey we don't need a bass, we got an organ" The result is some fucking carnival music. It sounds like shit! They bore the hell out of me! The music sucks my will to live. Pearl jam is another one. They were the "Best Band" of a music genre that lasted 4 fuckin years & grunge destroyed hair metal, which was really the shit. So Pearl Jam AND NIRVANA (who wouldn't be shit if Kurt Kobain didn't die) Destroyed hair metal, thanks!

Starbucks: Now this isn't Starbucks fault. I hate coffee, but I do think Starbucks is evil.

Cake: Despise it! Cake is too sweet, frosting is straight sugar & it makes my stomach & Teeth hurt. Id rather eat more REAL food.

Caddyshack: THE MOST OVERRATED MOVIE EVER! Period. People absolutely LOVE this flick, BIll Murray is about 3/4 retarded, and the "Legendary One Liners" aren't really funny.

There are LOTS more, ill keep you posted!

Friday, October 17, 2008

Kenny G & Grillz.....

So me & KG (Dad) are watching Clueless, randomly it was on, and Dad sees Dee's Boyfriend (cant recall the character name) and he has braces in the movie, my dad says does he have a grill? I say no, he has braces , dad says arent they the same thing? I say no a grill is a mouthpiece made out of diamonds. KG says Thats stupid, I say yeah, pretty much. And that was that...

Also here is a bad song about grillz

Back at the crib...for a bit

So yesterday I "moved back" into the crib because Bridgette is in NYC to see her friend Jess. Its kind of weird, 1st of all the house is SUPER CLEAN because it is for sale, so everything I do I got to make SURE I keep it spotless, its kind of a challenge for me lol. I would've just stayed at the parents house but my cat needs a epilepsy pill every morning so I for sure don't want to go 20 mins+ out of my way every morning to give my cat his meds, I also don't want to have my brother or someone else give him his pill while shes out of town, thatd be lazy. The 2nd weird thing is that I'm living out of a suitcase in my own house. I don't want to unpack my shit, because ill be going back Monday night, I do miss my bed though, I also miss my cat Harley, I don't miss 23 mins to work (at my parents its 10) I also don't miss going all the way across town to grocery shop and do random chores, I hardly use any gas now. Overall the situation blows, I wish i could live in my own house, w/ my wife & cat and that's it, things do happen for a reason though...

Thursday, October 16, 2008

Birthdays & Facebook...

My birthday is in 2 weeks. its my 30th bday & I'm kinda stoked, kind of like a new start. However 1 thing is for sure I'm going to be Inundated w/ emails from Facebook saying someone left me a comment. Now this is all good, but the vast majority of these peeps wouldn't know it was your bday if Facebook didn't say so. So basically you get a ton of comments from your fringe friends. People who feel obligated because Facebook says it. Don't get me wrong, I do it too! I too feel obligated, but its kind of a funny situation! Further more, some of these people you haven't seen or really even talked to in a long time, so whats the point? I think its a selfish happiness, you know you did something so its out of the way, but then again when its your bday on Facebook ill be sure to say whats up!

Wednesday, October 15, 2008

The Pickup Artist...

You ever see a stupid show that you cant get enough of? some of those shows for me have been The Hills, Project Runway, Rock of Love & Joe Millionaire. However the current one for me is The Pickup Artist on VH1. This show is AWFUL! However I get so intrigued by it that I just have to watch. For those that don't know The PUA is a guy named Mystery(yeah they don't use their real names) Hes a skinny unattractive dude who is THE MAN when it comes to getting ladies, his right hand man is a guy named Matador (yeah that's right) and this season there is a chick named Tara. Basically there are 8 total tools who Mystery is trying to transform into the PUA. These guys range from A guy who girls think is gay to a 28 yr old virgin. HELPLESS! In fact this years crop is so bad that 1 guy already got booted. Now it sounds retarded but these techniques really do work, throughout the show you see these guys get girls and its awesome! But Mystery is SUCH A TOOL I just don't get it at all, He does magic, and hes really unattractive, but somehow it all works for him. i got a text last night from my sister in law who said he should be like my idol now lol, shes prob right, I can utilize these techniques to be a pimp! lol but in all honesty id feel like a douche!

Tuesday, October 14, 2008

White Trash Bumper Sticker Part 2

So im on the bike & I get behind a Ford Ranger, 1 bumper sticker says NO BAMA, with a white flag, the 2nd one says & I shit you not: "Jet Noise, the Sound of Freedom" I laughed my ass off. Hilarious!

Monday, October 13, 2008

Happy Kill A Native American, Take His Land & Rape His Wife Day!

Christopher Columbus is a piece of shit. The blog twodayslate already said what i wanted to say so here it is!
"Christopher Columbus is known in the United States of America to be the founder of the Americas. We celebrate him in October but, in fact, he did not go onto the mainland (United States) until his third voyage in 1498. He also was not the earliest European explorer to reach the Americas, as there are accounts of European transatlantic contact prior to 1492. In fact, Scandinavian Vikings already had settlements in the Americas in the eleventh century, and British fishermen probably fished the shores of Canada for decades before Columbus. His voyage is more famous because of his nationalism and the economic competition. Columbus was in the right place at the right time and had the most power.
Columbus did not do anything that others did not already do before him. The earth was already proved to be round. The Egyptian-Greek scientist Erastosthenes, already had measured the circumference and diameter of the world in the third century B.C. Arab scientists had developed a whole discipline of geography and measurement, and in the tenth century A.D., Al Maqdisi described the earth with 360 degrees of longitude and 180 degrees of latitude. The Monastery of St. Catherine in the Sinai still has an icon — painted 500 years before Columbus — which shows Jesus ruling over a spherical earth. And as said above, Scandinavian Vikings already had settlements in the Americas in the eleventh century, and British fishermen probably fished the shores of Canada for decades before Columbus. Columbus was very greedy; he voyaged for three things, “Gold, Glory and God”. In his search for gold he killed many people and almost wiped out an entire civilization by himself. He did this for many reasons. One of course was for personal gain and the other was for Spain. If he did not get gold for Queen Isabella and King Ferdinand they would not finance Columbus’ trip. Columbus had to pay the Queen and King back and he would do anything to do that. This need to repay his debt can be found in Columbus’ diaries as he raced from one Caribbean island to the next, stealing anything of value and killing or capturing Native Americans.
Columbus did many bad things to the natives and he killed almost all of them. He forced them to find gold where there was none, and if they did not find any Columbus would kill them. Columbus also forced the natives to become slaves, most of the natives died on their way to Spain. Columbus and his men threw the native’s corpses over the side of the boat and into the ocean. The natives that did not become slaves worked on plantations or mines where they too would die from the hard working conditions. The natives did nothing to deserve these harsh conditions; they greeted the Europeans to their land with open arms.
Christopher Columbus is very influential in our culture. We celebrate him and his accomplishments on Columbus Day. In fact, the United States honors only two men holidays bearing their names, Christopher Columbus and Martin Luther King, Jr. In January we commemorate the birth of Martin Luther King, Jr., who tried to stop racial prejudice and relinquish the remaining bonds of slavery in America, and in October, we honor Christopher Columbus, who opened the Atlantic slave trade and launched one of the greatest waves of genocide known in history."
Well said twodayslate! Columbus has been a Native American Hitler for HUNDREDS of years, I say Hitler because there is really NO DIFFERENCE except the Media was there to cover Hitler. Could you imagine the outrage if there was a Hitler day? It would tremendously offensive for MILLIONS of people. So basically in closing, Jerusalem doesn't have a Hitler day? Why the fuck do we have Columbus day?

Sunday, October 12, 2008

The Most Country Song Ever?

Heard this at the wedding (wouldnt let me embed)


I Have Seen Beer Heaven, it is good!

Went to my cousins wedding last night in Frankenmuth! It was a BLAST! Great people, great fun! Got REAL DRUNK, but loved every second of it! The only downside is the lack of single hot chicks. There was one! But every single guy in the wedding party was all over her, PLUS she already has 2 kids which puts her in the little to fertile class for me The best part was that at 11 p.m. when everyone is drunk the brought out an astounding array of snacks! Soft Pretzels w/ cheese, cheese sticks, chips & salsa, Pizza and Hot dogs croissants! Absolutely delicious! It was BEER HEAVEN. Seriously I didn't even know if I was dreaming or not. Turns out NOPE! It was legit! lol, So if you ever get a chance to go to a wedding in Frankenmuth, you may also experience beer heaven! May you love it as much as I did!

Friday, October 10, 2008

Now We Wait/Motorcycle Ride

So Bridge signed the papers and we now have to wait 21 days for this shit to be over. Im looking forward to moving on.

On a MUCH happier note me & my friend Katie who I have known for like 5 yrs went on a motorcycle ride yesterday. We went about 50 mi, it was very relaxing for me and she enjoyed it as well, I know what you're think, yes im still married, we are just friends, she wanted a ride and i decided id give her one...wait that sounded bad lol!

Wednesday, October 8, 2008


Bridgette hates when I post divorce shit on my blog, but oh well! Filed for divorce today, it was surreal, kind of sad and a HUGE pain in the ass! Not only did we drop $150 for some "paperwork" but now we are gonna lose our ass on our house! GREAT! 2008 is almost done though, bring on 2009! its a new year of opportunity for yours truly, anyone have a hot sister?

Tuesday, October 7, 2008

Realtors Blow


So me & Bridgette are trying to sell our house, neither one of us can afford keep it by ourselves, so we need to let it go. We decided to get a realtor, my boy JD hooked us w/ a guy and an appt, but he couldn't make it, then he couldn't make it again, then he got a new chick, i talked to her and made an appt for Mon at 5, she couldn't make it either, so we rescheduled for today at 5, I was fucking FURIOUS! I left that bitch an ANGRY ass voicemail, then she had the fucking nerve to call me and tell me she couldn't make it today and she had someone else on the case, I said OK, but this shit is unprofessional as fuck! SERIOUSLY, do appointments mean anything to these fucking people? Seriously? this is the #1 most difficult thing we have in this divorce, we missed 3 DAMN nice weekends to get this thing shown, guess what people don't go to open houses in the fucking winter, we have been inquiring for almost a month,. typically we'd be having an open house soon. Which as we know from HGTV is where it all happens! lol, I'm so fucking done w/ this, seriously if this dude fucking bails, FUCK REALTORS, right in their fucking ears......Rant Over

Walks With Dad

When i was younger and lived w/ my parents, me and dad would take walks all the time, our route was around 3 mi and took us about 35 mins or so, during these walks we'd talk about whatever was going on in our lives, this was in dad's peak of losing weight, he lost over 75 lbs on weight watchers (he has since gained it ALL back & more) now he's walking again, but he gets chest pains on the hills, he's gotten it checked out & they say things are fine, but it scares him so much that he is afraid to walk. Hopefully, we can keep this going, its good bonding time w/ dad, and its good exercise too.

Sunday, October 5, 2008

White Trash Bumper Sticker..

So I go grocery shopping this morning and I stop at a light, I get behind a RATTY Chevy Astrovan from the early 90's, it was two-toned, maroon & rust, on the back rear window there was a bumper sticker that said and I quote "Im not tailgating, I'm drafting, NASCAR" I was like WTF? on a early 90s Astrovan, it was hilarious!

Friday, October 3, 2008

Movie of My Life

Ive often thought about what if there was a movie of my life. Who would play me & my supporting cast, here we go!

Bobby G- Shia LaBouf, I wish it was someone better lol but hes hot right now and looks enough like me to make it work,

Bridgette- id go w/ Emma stone from Superbad fame, shes a redhead and she cute like Bridgette.

Big Tim- Id go w/ Seth Rogan! He looks like Big Tim even though hes YOUNGER

Big Chris- Chris Klein, the way he was in American Pie reminded me of Chris plus he looks kinda like him even though Big Chris is way shorter.(Btw I would picked Matthew LeBLanc but hes WAY older)

Ubish-Michael Cera, hes low key like Ubish & Sneaky funny like Ubish as well.

Acadia-Ubish' wife, Colby Smulders from How I Met Your Mother, shes tall and pretty & dark haired.

Casey Bowman-REVISED im going to go w/ Zach Braff w/ a buzzcutt, & a goatee, thats what CB said! lol

OK your Turn! Who would it be? Come on Bloggers Don't let me down!

Thursday, October 2, 2008

Hillarity From the Parents House:

This is going to be a new segment on the G-Spot, random funny things my parents do that i forgot about cause I haven't lived there in 8 yrs:

My mom is TOTALLY incapable of operating the remote! Seeing what channel something is on is AT LEAST a 5 minute ordeal, she keeps hitting the wrong buttons, then she has to look at the remote in disbelief and see what the hell is going on only to repeat this 5 times! Now a good Son would help, but she has to learn.

My dad is the snoring est man on earth. He always cashes out watching TV at like 10 pm, which is cool we have ALL DONE IT. But the bitch of it is he starts snoring like a chainsaw convention, loud as hell, then he'd get momentary consciousness and be out again. he calls it "the Mode" A funny story Tuesday night i came home from the bar and KG (dad) was cashed out on the couch, I'm trying to get in the house w/ the key which is the loudest key/lock combo in the history of earth! And he wakes up and half asleep says I thought you were someone trying to break in...I'm like really? that's the conclusion you make IMMEDIATELY? Way to be asleep dad lol

Wednesday, October 1, 2008

7 Random things about me or Ill die!

This is for you Becky! BTW me you & Jason need to go get beers!
1. I HATE CHEMICALS! I never use them except Formula 409 & Windex, its a very unnatural fear, its in fact, very stupid. They scare the shit out of me.

2. I have to have a fan when I sleep or I dont sleep. If I feel where im going isnt going to have a fan I bring my own, every time, even camping I got a battery operated fan, that i use.

3. I love musicals! Especially the newer stuff, Im not a fan of like Westside Story or anything, I like musicals pretty much since .Cats, My favorites are Wicked, Rent, Phantom, Spring Awakening, Avenue Q & many more.

4. IM A HUGE hip-hop fan. Everything from like 1988-2000 or so! The stuff now is ABSOLUTE garbage. But back in the day it was the JAM!

5. My eyes arent connected so I can move them independently from each other, its freaky, ill have to show you sometime.

6. When I was 15 I got in a moped accident & got road rash from my ankle to my ass on my left leg. It hurt like a SOB and ruined a whole summer, between 9th & 1oth grade,

7. Im an atheist. Im not a preachy athiest, like if you got all jesusfied around me then id probably roll my eyes but I wouldnt say shit, but I think religion is FUCKED up. However if you are friend of mine & you are religious ill still love you for sure!

Sometimes You are Just TIRED!

Sometimes when you are sitting at home watching Biggest Loser w/ your parents on a Tuedsday, and the show gets over at 10, you decide to go to the bar, even though typically you go to bed at like 11pm, especially when you have to work twice on Wednesday. And sometimes when you go to the bar you drink beers. Sometimes you drink 2 big beers and a bottle of beer (5 beers) and stay there until name that tune is over at 1 am. Sometimes you wake up at 4am mad at life and chug 3 glasses of water. Sometimes at 7:45 am your alarm goes off and you get ready for work. Sometimes you get to work and are hungover. Sometimes you still have to work twice. Sometimes your day is gonna suck. Sometimes you're just stupid.