F You 2009!

2009 was the worst year of my life. No doubt. 2008 also sucked, but due to the intense loss I have dealt with this year, it beats it out. The year started out great, with tons of hope and excitement. The anticipation of a great year w/ my new GF Lori was amazing! I was so excited w/ starting our life together! have a new GF rules! You find out all the little stuff about them that you love, and all the ways to make them smile. You also found out what they don't like and what you should never do again lol. Things went fairly smoothly until about July. I sold the house (THANK GOD) and got 2 new jobs to replace the Ann Arbor News closing. But after the house was gone I got all the bills the ex never paid, and that caused a rift in our relationship. We eventually broke up, but on GREAT TERMS! Our friendship was blossoming! it was actually amazing! It was so seamless. Everything was going great until October 25, when she took her own life. I was numb. I was a shell of myself. I didn't know what to do or how to handle it. I overreacted, and was very overbearing to the family and Lori friends. I certainly regret my actions, but I was not in a proper state of mind to be held accountable for my actions. My bday on November 1 was a bright spot. I was so sad and some friends MADE me get out of the house and out of my Pajamas lol, and I went out and had a great night on the town! When I got back however reality hit again. I started therapy in early November. Its been VERY helpful in getting through this tough time.  I feel like ME again! I feel like I am feeling SO much better, but at the same time the memories never go away and sometimes a bout of sad hits. Its going to be like that for a while I bet. The year hasn't been ALL bad however. This traumatic event has taught me so much about being strong. Its made me realize I can handle anything, and its helped me be a great support system for friends going through traumatic events as well, because now I have been there. I love my jobs, I've got a great apt that I love and of course so much support from all my friends and family. So...here's to a great 2010. We all deserve it!