Tuesday, August 4, 2009

Time MAchine Tuesday! Old Post! RTT:, Moving addition!




TIME MACHINE TUESDAY 
OLD POST!!!
Canton Ohio, 2002

Now as many of you folks know, I along with my friends the DNE (Deez Nuts Experience) are quite amazing at the bar game name this tune. For you not familiar with the game, a DJ will lay a 10-30 second segment of a song & you get points for title & artist. Well in 2002, we were a FORCE at this game, it was the same people every Tuesday like clock work. We were the #1 qualifiers BY FAR (though some of that had to do w/ Goodies Never ending wallet & shot purchases lol)

SO we are invited to Canton Ohio for the championships, Now we all have cars, but for the DNE (the Crew consisted of, Me, Tommy, OE, Dave & Gary Fritts, & I believe that was it) We had to roll Big Time, Enter Dave & Gary Fritts' Parents, We rolled down there fat in a WINNEBAGO! It was dope, fully stocked fridge, & poor Gary Fritts driving, we all drank & rehearsed our skit (more on this later) and we got to Canton in no time, well since we were in a rolling hotel lodging fees were minimal, OK they were nothing! Well we all chipped in for gas..

There were several teams (16 I think) And the 1st round was 100 songs, title & artist 2 points for each, & spelling counted (or something stupid like that) So outta 16 teams we were 13th, we knew that there was NO WAY we were gonna win this event, so we started drinking, and drinking, and drinking, We Drank so damn much we drank the bars outta Coors Light tall boys. It was spectacular, we were in full party mode. The top four teams got to do a skit, lip synching & they got points towards the finals. We rehearsed our skit (Back Street Boys Get Down) and even though we weren't in the top 4 they lt us do it anyway because we were drunken Rock stars lol Now We rehearsed our skit on the way & we were shit canned, we were lipsynching AWFULLY! We looked like dogs w/ peanut butter on our lips. The funniest part was every one loved us, mainly because we were so awful, but it turned out that everyone elses skits were AMAZING! They had props & backgrounds & matching outfit & shit, we were way out of our league! It was crazy!

Well there was a chick that one of our buddies was hangin out with all night & he was kinda playing her off, she wanted to hang out & she said what can i do? He said bye all my boys beers all night & SHE DID! We drank fro free from like 10pm-2am, We were WASTED! I was so drunk i drank Gary's Tobacco Spitter, it was gross but I was so drunk I didnt care, it was terrible, but I didnt puke & now its funny. Well unfortunately I had an admirer as well. She was what could be categorized as a grenade, she was the ugly friend. She looked like a Fat Darlene from Roseanne, I kept fending her off all night & finally the time of the night came & we decided to retire.

I got to the Winnebago & am about to cash out. Well this Ugly girl comes into the Winnebago & jumps in the bed. She said I have all this energy, how can You help me with that? Now I should preface this by saying that what I said to her has become stuff of legend. It wasnt my intention at the time, but heres what happened. I said to her "You can give me some head" She said to me :"I dont do that" I told her
"I thought everything Blew in Ohio!" Now before I said this I knew 1 of 2 things would happen. 1. Shed leave which is cool, 2. Id get head also cool. Well she left but my boys were going APESHIT! It was Glorious! Well the next day it was time to go home. We are driving home & We are invited to Name This Tune at The Distillery in toledo OH. We all call off work the next day & decide to go. We are met up with by a few friends. Kara & Brandon Sands. We had a blast. I dont recall so much of that night except we DRANK, ALOT & won the game. All in all it was one of the greatest times of my whole life.

WHOS NUTS?
DEEZ NUTS!


RTT: Moving addition!

Check out the Un-mom, She runs this shit! 

Why do apartment complex screens on the screen doors ALWAYS BLOW! Has anyone ever successfully opened one of these things? 

Why are apt doors and hallways so small? I mean if I was building a place id make it move in friendly with high and wide doors! People move every year! 

Why do apt showers always suck? It feels like water is barely coming out! I dont feel clean! I got Irish Spring Residue all over me! 

Apt parking? WTF?  I LOVE parking a 1/4 mi away from my car. 

Love dumpsters! Thats MAD TRASH! no worries about if they'll pick it up or what it weighs. Mine is a decent walk though, which come winter will be awful...

My cat doesnt know WTF is goin on. He's exploring his new world, which apparently means meowing at 5:30 am. Its NICE to have him not confined to essentially one room. he needs new toys ASAP! 

OK FOLKS! Moving story soon! I didnt take pics OF the move but I will photograph my new apt for all my bloggy friends to see!!!!! 

Peace! 



11 comments:

Dawn Parsons Smith said...

You are hilarious as always!

Now, FYI...I grew up in Ohio, you silly goose...I know about all of this OH/MI rivalry stuff...believe me...I suffered through it every football season....(that being said, your snark to the OH girl was pretty funny...)

Hope your pussy gets settled in soon;)

Ally Wasmund said...

I agree. Apartments SUCK.

Stopping over from UnMom's! Have a rockin' day.

Hit 40 said...

Get a new shower head!! It might even blow for you. You can easily replace your apt cheapo with something nice. When you move out, you can put the piece of junk back up.

Liz Mays said...

What I remember the most about apartment life is the walking over head of the neighbors, loud music, and pipes creaking. Good times, apartment living, good times. It won't be forever and it's better than living with the 'rents!

Lee said...

I read this whole thing, confused, because I missed the whole "back in 2002" thing.
I was like WHY WOULD YOU WANT FAT GIRL HEAD WHEN YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
And then I figured it out.
Hahaha.

Anonymous said...

Don't be mean to the ugly friend!!!

That would be me.

*cries*

Keely said...

I miss my old apartment sometimes, but only because it was just me and my cat. I didn't have to share my crappy shower with ANYBODY.

I did, however, have to listen to my upstairs neighbours have drunken make-up sex at 4am almost every day. I don't miss that. She sounded like a squirrel.

Sarah said...

I think I may be the only 31 year old that has NEVER lived in an apartment complex....because of the above mentioned problems. Not to mention: loud ass people at 3am, hearing sexscapades at 2am, car alarms going off, and people leaving their bags of trash outside their door in the hallways. I've witnessed all of this at OTHER people's apartments. It DOES beat living with the rents though and I'm happy for you.

Unknown said...

I worked for an apt complex for over 10 years and the things of which you ask are still a memory to me

Unknown said...

Moving from a house to an apartment has to suck, but once you get used to it you will have a great time!

Caitlin said...

Everything about living in the apartment will even out soon enough!! Looking forward to the pix!