Urinal Etiquette, the Definitive Guide.

So I am at work today at the urinal, and my boss comes up next to me. He starts a conversation, now this is an awkward moment in urinal etiquette because hes my boss. If it was someone else id say "hey" and itd be done. Now when you are at a urinal and someone comes next to you, you must focus forward, if it helps to focus on graffiti or even a speck of dirt then you can do that. There should be NO TALKING, even if I know you, talking is typically prohibited unless you are not in the urinal next to me or at the sink washing your hands out of view. However typically I just wait until I'm all done.

Sporting Events
Now Sporting Events pose a different challenge all together, thanks to a lovely creation I call "The Group trough" See below:

Now when you are at the group trough its pretty much like a long feeding trough for cows (Hence the name) and a slight slope w/ a drain at the end. The group trough may be the quietest place on earth. Its you & your cock on display for all to see without any barriers in between. You MUST focus forward, people don't want their dicks looked at & you also don't want to see one anyways.

UM Stadium
UM football Stadium is a whole other beast in itself. While the rules are basically the same as the group Trough it is its own beast. The Men's room at UM Stadium is basically a series of walls about 5 feet high with water running down it & a drain situation at the bottom. A men's roof at UM Stadium can easily hold 400 people, its extremely efficient, but not a very comfy situation, like the stadium itself you are RIGHT next to the guy your pissing with, its kind of a tense moment.

So ladies now you know, I feel urinal etiquette is passed on from a father to a son, Dad teaches you all the necessary rules you need to survive, and you take it from there. Its a strong foundation of manhood! Maybe the most important thing you learn EVER in life.